Worry

If you know me, you know I struggle with worry. It is a family curse. We are all struck with anxiety issues, disorders, etc. I feel like I've had a lot to worry about the past year with all of Eli's health issues, etc. I don't think I truly vocalized how much I worried about Eli the past year. Terrible two's + hospitalization + constant digestive sickness until we figured out he needed to be gluten free + speech problems +navigating a gluten free life = one stressed out Mama! I finally just spilled out all the worries that are swirling around in this crazy brain of mine last night on Brandon. He was sweet and just listened and reassured me, which is just what I needed. I guess I need to just say out loud that I am worried that Eli will be ostracised in school because of his speech problems and also because he is always going to be having to eat different things than the other kids. It's like a double whammy. I was feeling discouraged yesterday, and needed reminding of all the steps we've made. Brandon reminded me that Eli has friends despite the fact he isn't always understood. He and his best friend Seth are close as brothers, and his teachers rave about how good he is in Sunday School. I am SO thankful for how far he's come this past year. He hasn't been digestively sick in THREE MONTHS! This is huge for us! It is the longest he's ever gone without getting sick or having gluten issues. Praise God! It is a joy to watch him feeling GOOD for once. Also, in just three months of speech, he can now say several sounds he wasn't able to before. I was frustrated this week because he's started a new bad speech habit recently that the therapist has never seen before and is seeking out help on dealing with (on any word involving an s + vowel he puts an "l" sound after the "s", so sun is "slun" or sock is "slock". I let that one little detail drag me down instead of focusing on the positive. I do feel better saying it all out loud instead of just holding it inside! I think a lot of this has to do with the fact he is starting preschool in a week and a half and there are a lot of unknowns right now. I am in the process of trying to move him over to the public school system's speech program, so that's weighing on my mind as well. God is in control!